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Evil Roy Slade: A Dog Tale of Woe
By Gary Wilkes
Evil Roy Slade was a dogcatcher's worst nightmare. He was a pure- bred German Shorthaired Pointer with the soul of a coyote. Even though one of his hind legs was slightly crooked he was faster than any human. His range was about two square miles of alleys and backyards. All efforts to catch him failed. Roy was a street- wise dog.
Roy started out as a cute, ten-pound speckled puppy. His owner, Marvin, liked the idea of having a hunting dog. He had seen one on television, working for its master with precision and devo-tion. Marvin had dreams of buying hunting gear from a catalog and training Roy to be like the dog on television. Somehow Marvin never got around to ordering the gear or training the dog. His wife, Mary, had not wanted a dog in the first place. As Marvin paid less attention to Roy, Mary resented the extra responsibili-ty of looking after a new puppy - so she didn't.
As he grew, Roy began exploring the neighborhood. His earliest wanderings were short and much more fun than being chained to the front porch. He started by digging up the garden next door. He loved to grab door mats and tear them to pieces. Each trip went a little farther and lasted a little longer. Soon Roy was staying out over night and coming home in the morning after Marvin went to work. Marvin worried at first, but soon came to accept the fact that Roy was a wanderer.
On one nocturnal jaunt, Roy saw a huge box-like creature moving right at him. Confused and unable to react quickly, Roy stood frozen in the light thrown at him by the creature's eyes. Over the years Roy learned to ignore these boxes since they always stopped for him. Once, while chasing a cat, he darted in front of one of them. The car-creature hit him and sent him sprawling. A sudden pain immobilized him for a few seconds. The driver of the car stopped and tried to pick up the dog he had just injured. Roy bit him and hobbled home on three legs. The leg healed before anyone at home noticed the injury. The leg became permanently deformed and so did Roy's attitude about people and car-crea-tures.
By the age of two Roy had some new habits. He learned to knock over trash cans to get at the tasty treats concealed within. He also learned to guard his snacks by growling and biting. Just showing his teeth and growling was enough to make most humans back off. As Roy's aggression grew so did the complaints to animal control. He bit an old man who found Roy in his garage. He bit a small girl who rode her bike past him. Animal control took reports from the victims but was unable to catch Evil Roy Slade.
Though Roy was well known and disliked by many of their neigh-bors, Bob and Mary never saw his bad behavior. As he grew older their contact with Roy decreased. On the rare occasions when they gave him some affection, Roy leaped and jumped and licked and got dirt on their clothes. This caused them to limit their contact to dumping food in his bowl when he wasn't looking. To them, he was a familiar nuisance. Marvin had a vague feeling of guilt whenever he looked at Roy.
One summer evening, Roy started his nightly rounds as usual. He jumped several fences and knocked over a garbage can on his favorite street. He snuffled and ripped through the trash until he found a sizable lump of raw hamburger. Roy ate his last meal with gusto. The poison concealed in the meat did its work a few hours later. Roy died far from home.
When Marvin got home the next day he didn't notice that Roy was gone. It wasn't unusual for Roy to be away for a day or two. When he finally realized that Roy wasn't coming back, Marvin felt sure he knew what had happened. Roy must have had been stolen. After all, he was an expensive hunting dog. Marvin was very angry that someone would steal his dog. He was mildly sad that Roy wasn't there but he knew how to solve his problem. He got another puppy the next day. He named the new pup Roy-two.
Every neighborhood has its equivalent of Evil Roy Slade. On a daily basis hundreds of dogs across the valley wander the streets. Many owners justify their neglect by claiming that dogs are meant to run free. They feel that it is cruel to confine an animal to a house or yard. That's the way Roy's owner felt. Roy is unavailable for comment.
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